Exploring Marriage and Live-In Relationships in Ancient India: A Timeless Perspective

Marriage, as a social institution, has undergone numerous transformations across the world, and India is no exception. In ancient India, relationships were diverse and complex, with various forms of unions beyond the conventional, traditional marriage. While modern concepts of marriage and live-in relationships are often viewed as a product of contemporary society, historical records reveal that India’s cultural practices have long embraced a variety of relationship models. This article explores the fascinating world of ancient Indian marriages, live-in relationships, and the various forms of unions that reflect the profound understanding of love, partnership, and individual rights.
Ancient Indian society had a multifaceted view of relationships, as evident from the numerous forms of marriages and unions that were practiced. These relationships were shaped by philosophical, social, and cultural ideals, many of which allowed for flexibility in personal choices.
Among the most respected forms of marriage in ancient India was the Brahma marriage, where the groom was expected to be a man of good character, and the bride a woman of similar virtues. This type of union was typically arranged by the families, and it involved a formal ceremony. It was regarded as the ideal marriage form in Hindu society, where both partners came together for spiritual and societal duties.
The Gandharva marriage is perhaps the closest ancient Indian concept to the modern-day live-in relationship. According to the ancient texts, a Gandharva marriage occurred when two individuals, usually in love, decided to unite without formal ceremonies or family involvement. It was based on mutual affection and respect. This type of union was often depicted in the Mahabharata and Ramayana, where couples like Shakuntala and Dushyanta, and Krishna and Rukmini, chose their partners based on love, completely defying the rigid norms of arranged marriages. This form of union suggested a much more liberal view on relationships and is one of the earliest examples of consent-based marriages in Indian history.
These forms of marriages, though less popular, represented a more transactional or coercive approach. The Asura marriage involved the groom giving significant gifts or a dowry to the bride’s family. In contrast, the Rakshasa marriage was characterized by the abduction of the bride, often against her will, reflecting a forceful and aggressive approach. While these forms are less celebrated today, they provide insight into the varying societal attitudes toward relationships and gender roles in ancient times.
This was considered the least reputable form of marriage in ancient India. It involved the union of a man and woman, sometimes when either or both parties were intoxicated or unconscious. The lack of mutual consent and the absence of ethical values in these unions made it the most controversial form of marriage.


The Kamasutra by Vatsyayana, written around the 3rd century CE, is not merely a guide to sexual pleasure but also a comprehensive text on relationships, love, and marriage. The text explores various aspects of human intimacy, relationship dynamics, and even offers guidance on maintaining harmony and fulfillment in one’s union.
Within the Kamasutra, the concept of Gandharva marriage is recognized and celebrated. Vatsyayana discusses the importance of mutual affection, desire, and the role of emotional connections in romantic relationships. While Kamasutra does not explicitly promote live-in relationships as a social norm, it acknowledges the diversity of human relationships and the value of emotional compatibility over formal rituals. The text’s discussions on love, consent, and companionship resonate with modern ideas of relationships based on mutual respect and understanding.

In addition to the practical aspects of relationships, ancient Indian texts also focused on the philosophical and spiritual dimensions of marriage. The Vedas and the Upanishads, the core scriptures of Hinduism, offer insights into marriage as a sacred union with a higher purpose. The relationship between a husband and wife was seen as one of companionship, mutual support, and a partnership that extended beyond this lifetime into the afterlife.
For instance, the Rigveda contains several hymns that describe the role of the wife as a companion and co-worker in the pursuit of spiritual and material growth. The idea of dharma (duty) is central to many of these texts, with the marriage bond viewed as an essential component of fulfilling one’s duty to society, family, and the divine.
The concept of marriage in ancient India was also influenced by the belief that it was a partnership in the pursuit of moksha (liberation from the cycle of rebirth). Thus, marriage was seen as more than a social contract; it was a spiritual union that enabled both partners to grow together, supporting each other’s spiritual journey.
While the term “live-in relationship” is relatively modern, the idea behind it has existed in various forms in Indian history. The Gandharva marriage, as discussed earlier, provides an ancient parallel to today’s live-in relationships. It was a relationship based on mutual affection, where the couple lived together without the need for formal rituals or societal approval. This marriage model was often celebrated in literature, as it highlighted love as the central foundation of the union, free from external interference.
Additionally, the practice of cohabitation before marriage, although not universally accepted, was not unheard of. Certain sects and tribes in ancient India practiced what could be seen as early forms of live-in relationships, where the focus was on companionship, love, and the choice to live together without the formalities of a traditional marriage.

Ancient Indian epics such as the Ramayana and the Mahabharata offer a treasure trove of information on relationships. Characters like Sita and Rama, Draupadi and the Pandavas, and Arjuna and Subhadra depict various aspects of love, marriage, and partnership. Some of these relationships were based on love and consent, while others were dictated by duty and divine will. The epics demonstrate the complexity of relationships and the nuanced ways in which individuals navigate love, duty, and societal expectations.
In the Mahabharata, the relationship between Draupadi and the Pandavas, for example, challenges the notion of monogamy, as she shared her life with five husbands, each fulfilling different roles. Similarly, the love story of Shakuntala and Dushyanta, though based on a Gandharva marriage, was one of deep emotional and spiritual bonding, despite being initially unrecognized by society.

As time progressed, societal norms shifted, and new forms of marriage were institutionalized. The influence of various dynasties, along with the spread of foreign ideas, transformed marital customs. During the medieval period, practices like dowry and child marriage became widespread, and marriage itself became a more rigid institution tied to societal roles.
However, the ancient openness to various types of unions left an enduring legacy. Today, as India continues to grapple with the concepts of live-in relationships and modern marriage, understanding ancient practices provides context for these discussions. The Gandharva marriage, with its focus on mutual affection and consent, resonates with contemporary notions of romantic relationships based on equality and personal choice.
In conclusion, ancient India’s approach to marriage and relationships was far more diverse and flexible than many modern perceptions might suggest. From the spiritual union seen in the Vedas to the love-based Gandharva marriage, ancient practices laid the foundation for a more open-minded approach to human relationships. While societal changes have transformed the institution of marriage, the core principles of love, consent, and partnership remain deeply embedded in Indian culture.
As contemporary society debates the merits of live-in relationships, understanding the historical context helps illuminate the long-standing tradition of relationships based on choice, mutual respect, and emotional connection. The timeless nature of love and companionship, as demonstrated by ancient Indian marriage practices, continues to shape how we view relationships today.