Are Women Really Their Own Worst Enemy? The Truth You Need to Hear

Not every woman fits the "girl’s girl" mold, and that’s okay. Some women might not vibe with the whole sisterhood idea, maybe because they've been burned or simply don’t feel like they belong. But here’s the reality: it’s not about all women being out to get each other. It’s about recognizing that sometimes, unhealed women can become their own worst enemy, projecting their insecurities onto others. And while feminism is about equality, it doesn’t mean blindly supporting a woman’s wrongs. Being a "girl’s girl" doesn’t mean accepting toxic behavior from women trying to sabotage you. In fact, acknowledging when women tear each other down is essential to healing, because competition and jealousy are as real among women as they are anywhere else.


Let’s be clear: the problem isn’t women in general—it’s unhealed women. When a woman hasn’t done the inner work, she’s like a mirror reflecting all her pain. And what’s the easiest way to deal with that? Tear others down so you don’t have to look at your own reflection. You know the type: the ones who say, “You’ve gained weight,” or “Are you really wearing that?” Those who can’t handle seeing you thrive because it makes them feel smaller. Well, newsflash: Their problem isn’t your glow—it’s the fact that they haven’t learned how to shine on their own. Unhealed women want you to shrink so they can breathe. And it’s always about control. Why? Because if they can make you feel inferior, they feel like they’re not failing. But trust me—their insecurity is the only thing failing here.


Let’s talk about the one thing that’s been true since time immemorial: misery loves company. And when someone is trapped in their own unhappiness, your success feels like a punch to their gut. They might look at you and think, "How can she be so perfect? Why can’t I be that?" Guess what? No matter how much you do, no matter how much you glow, they’ll find a way to make you feel like you’re doing too much. "You’re too loud," "You're too confident," "You think you're better than everyone." But here’s the truth: They don’t want you to shrink—they want you to validate their insecurity. Remember this: The more you shine, the more they have to confront their own darkness. And trust me, no one ever learned to love themselves by dimming someone else’s light.


If you’re confident, you’re probably a walking trigger for someone who's insecure. They don’t want to admit it, but every little win you have, every joy you share, feels like a reminder of their own shortcomings. And here's the twist: they’ll project that onto you. It’s like a broken record of “You’re too this, you’re too that.” And when you rise, they’ll say things like, “It’s not that deep,” “You’re just lucky,” or “Why are you acting like you’ve got it all together?” Because the thought of you having it all together makes them realize they’re still unraveling. But the key to understanding this is: Your success isn’t about them. It’s just that your confidence shines a light on their lack of it. And let’s be honest—no one wants to confront the mess inside. So, they tear you down to make themselves feel more comfortable in their chaos.


Now, let’s talk about envy. The thing about envy is—it’s never just about wanting something. It’s about needing what you have because they can’t bear the idea that you deserve it more than they do. The most dangerous thing an envious person will do? They’ll try to outshine you in your own life. The ultimate goal isn’t just about owning what you have—it’s about becoming you and showing you that they can do your life better than you. And let’s be clear: when someone’s trying to steal your shine, it’s because they can’t find their own. Envy is a sad little monster, feeding on someone else’s glow to try and validate its own existence. They won’t win. You can’t steal someone’s essence and expect to wear their crown. It’s one size fits all, and that size is called authenticity.


Women are amazing when they support each other. For every woman who tries to tear you down, there are ten who are ready to lift you up. Women who heal stop competing. The minute you accept that your worth doesn’t rely on comparing yourself to others, you step into your true power. Once women heal, they realize: there is no “too much.” There is no “too pretty” or “too successful.” We can all be the best versions of ourselves without ever having to dim someone else’s light. There’s no space for insecurity, envy, or competition when healing is at the core. When women heal, we rise. And we rise together.