The End of “Good Girl Syndrome”: Why Indian Women Are Saying No to Perfection
Riya Kumari | Jan 04, 2025, 22:17 IST
You see, we’ve all been in that “Good Girl” trap, right? The one where we’re supposed to be the perfect employee, perfect friend, perfect partner, perfect daughter, perfect human being. And for what? To get a gold star from society? Spoiler: the gold star is an exhausting mental breakdown waiting to happen. And that’s if you’re lucky. If you’re unlucky, it’s a 2 a.m. Google search for “how to start loving yourself again after 15 years of being ‘good’.”
You know that moment when your mother looks at you, and you can almost hear her thinking, “Why can’t you be more like [insert name of perfect cousin here]?” Yeah, that’s “Good Girl Syndrome” in action. It’s the age-old narrative that Indian women are supposed to fit into this little box of perfection. You know, the kind of box that’s so small, it’s practically a participation trophy for being flawlessly self-sacrificing. But here’s the plot twist—turns out, women in India are sick of it. And I mean done.
1. The Never-Ending Struggle to Be Perfect
Let’s talk about this exhausting game we’ve all been playing for too long: trying to be perfect. You know the drill—washing your hair before every important day like your life depends on it, eating less to the point where even ants would be embarrassed for you, because this is what being perfect is all about. You’re supposed to look flawless, be flawless, do it all, without breaking a sweat. But spoiler alert: it’s an endless cycle that never ends.
We live in a world that sells us new insecurities every week. Do your makeup every day or get asked if you’re okay. We’re told we’re too fat, too thin, don’t have enough of this, or not enough of that. If you work at home, your husband finds his colleague attractive who does the same thing, but if you work outside, suddenly, your in-laws are unhappy and you get zero help. You’re stuck between two worlds, constantly being told you’re not enough in either. You lose yourself trying to balance it all, and the foundation was shaky to begin with—it was always meant to fall.
2. Perfection Wasn’t Built to Last
We’ve been there, right? That point where every guy in your life thinks you’re perfect, and every girl is wondering how you manage it. But even then, there’s something missing. It’s hollow. It doesn’t feel like enough because it never was. We’re running ourselves ragged trying to keep up with this image of what we’re “supposed” to be, but it’s just not sustainable. You work harder to be someone you’re not, just to meet a standard that doesn’t even fit you.
It’s like living with a never-ending to-do list. You’re a goddess, but you’ve got to have your looks, your body, your clothes, your career, your perfect social media—like it’s all part of a checklist for New Year’s resolutions that never get crossed off. Things change—your beauty fades, your bank account fluctuates, and external validation can never keep up. These things are temporary, and even if you get them, they’ll never fill the hole. Your self-worth doesn’t come from any of that.
3. True Worth Comes from Within
Your real worth is not defined by how many likes you get or how perfect your body is. It comes from your inner value, the one we all share. We’re all born with this innate worth that can never be taken away. We were made under the blueprint of something greater. So, if we doubt ourselves, we’re essentially doubting that greatness. We are perfect in our imperfections. It’s part of being human.
True worth isn’t in how we look or how much we earn. It’s in what we do. It’s in our actions, in how we make others feel, and how we show up for the world. These are the things that fulfill our soul’s purpose. Temporary, shallow things like social media likes or a glass skin that could reflect the sun don’t matter. They’ll come and go. But you? You are eternal. You’re on your own path, and each step gets you closer to the place you’re meant to be.
4. The Truth About Sacrifice and Self-Worth
No matter how much you sacrifice, no matter how much you please others, you’ll never be enough for everyone. People are bitter when they’re stuck in their own insecurities, and they nitpick others to project their unhappiness. It’s easier to tear someone else down than to work on yourself. So don’t listen to those voices. The ones that try to tell you that you’re not doing enough or that you’re too much. You only have one life, and you don’t owe it to anyone to live it according to their expectations. It’s time to mute the background noise and let the side characters stay where they belong. You don’t have to be perfect; you just have to be authentic. One life. One purpose. Live it unapologetically. Let go of the impossible ideal that was never meant for you and embrace the real, messy, beautiful you.
1. The Never-Ending Struggle to Be Perfect
Smudged Eye Makeup
Let’s talk about this exhausting game we’ve all been playing for too long: trying to be perfect. You know the drill—washing your hair before every important day like your life depends on it, eating less to the point where even ants would be embarrassed for you, because this is what being perfect is all about. You’re supposed to look flawless, be flawless, do it all, without breaking a sweat. But spoiler alert: it’s an endless cycle that never ends.
We live in a world that sells us new insecurities every week. Do your makeup every day or get asked if you’re okay. We’re told we’re too fat, too thin, don’t have enough of this, or not enough of that. If you work at home, your husband finds his colleague attractive who does the same thing, but if you work outside, suddenly, your in-laws are unhappy and you get zero help. You’re stuck between two worlds, constantly being told you’re not enough in either. You lose yourself trying to balance it all, and the foundation was shaky to begin with—it was always meant to fall.
2. Perfection Wasn’t Built to Last
Skincare
We’ve been there, right? That point where every guy in your life thinks you’re perfect, and every girl is wondering how you manage it. But even then, there’s something missing. It’s hollow. It doesn’t feel like enough because it never was. We’re running ourselves ragged trying to keep up with this image of what we’re “supposed” to be, but it’s just not sustainable. You work harder to be someone you’re not, just to meet a standard that doesn’t even fit you.
It’s like living with a never-ending to-do list. You’re a goddess, but you’ve got to have your looks, your body, your clothes, your career, your perfect social media—like it’s all part of a checklist for New Year’s resolutions that never get crossed off. Things change—your beauty fades, your bank account fluctuates, and external validation can never keep up. These things are temporary, and even if you get them, they’ll never fill the hole. Your self-worth doesn’t come from any of that.
3. True Worth Comes from Within
Donate
Your real worth is not defined by how many likes you get or how perfect your body is. It comes from your inner value, the one we all share. We’re all born with this innate worth that can never be taken away. We were made under the blueprint of something greater. So, if we doubt ourselves, we’re essentially doubting that greatness. We are perfect in our imperfections. It’s part of being human.
True worth isn’t in how we look or how much we earn. It’s in what we do. It’s in our actions, in how we make others feel, and how we show up for the world. These are the things that fulfill our soul’s purpose. Temporary, shallow things like social media likes or a glass skin that could reflect the sun don’t matter. They’ll come and go. But you? You are eternal. You’re on your own path, and each step gets you closer to the place you’re meant to be.
4. The Truth About Sacrifice and Self-Worth
Blame
No matter how much you sacrifice, no matter how much you please others, you’ll never be enough for everyone. People are bitter when they’re stuck in their own insecurities, and they nitpick others to project their unhappiness. It’s easier to tear someone else down than to work on yourself. So don’t listen to those voices. The ones that try to tell you that you’re not doing enough or that you’re too much. You only have one life, and you don’t owe it to anyone to live it according to their expectations. It’s time to mute the background noise and let the side characters stay where they belong. You don’t have to be perfect; you just have to be authentic. One life. One purpose. Live it unapologetically. Let go of the impossible ideal that was never meant for you and embrace the real, messy, beautiful you.