The Indian Male Ego Is Under Threat—And It’s a Good Thing

There’s something quietly revolutionary happening around us. At first, it might go unnoticed. A father learning how to braid his daughter’s hair. A man openly speaking about therapy in a group of friends. A husband taking paternity leave without shame. And yet, these seemingly small acts carry the weight of generations. They signal a deep, cultural shift: the Indian male ego, as we’ve known it, is slowly cracking—and perhaps, for the better.
To understand what’s changing, we first need to recognize what has long been considered the Indian male ego. It’s that invisible yet ever-present social armor—a cocktail of pride, control, emotional restraint, and the unshakable belief that men must always “lead” while women “follow.” It's been passed down through proverbs, movies, and parental advice. “Mard ko dard nahi hota,” they said. Men don’t cry. Men don’t falter. Men don’t ask for help.
From village chaupals to urban boardrooms, this idea of masculinity dictated behavior. Anger was acceptable. Vulnerability was not. Authority was admired. Gentleness was mocked. But times are changing.

Thanks to wider access to education, global exposure through the internet, and greater gender representation in schools and workplaces, young men today are growing up in a vastly different environment than their fathers. They're seeing female classmates top exams, female bosses run companies, and stay-at-home dads redefine household dynamics.
With this exposure comes the realisation: strength isn’t about suppression. It’s about balance.
Social science classrooms now discuss gender identity. Instagram reels show men doing skincare routines without being called “less masculine.” Bollywood, slowly but surely, is beginning to tell stories where the hero isn’t a hyper-aggressive alpha male but a man in touch with his emotions.

For decades, male identity in India was shaped by the male gaze—what men thought men should be. Today, the female gaze is playing a powerful role in reshaping that narrative. Women are openly rejecting the emotionally unavailable “brooding macho man” trope. They're choosing emotional intelligence over arrogance, softness over swagger.
Young women, especially Gen Z and millennials, are calling out toxic masculinity in their relationships. They’re not afraid to ask their partners to go to therapy, share responsibilities, or just sit and talk about their feelings. The old male ego isn’t compatible with these expectations—and that’s pushing many men to reflect and evolve.


One of the most heavy and outdated ideas tied to masculinity in India is the notion that a man must always be the provider. Financial responsibility, career success, and the pressure to constantly "do more" still weighs heavily on the average Indian male, especially in middle-class households.
But the pandemic was a reality check. Many men lost jobs. Many saw their spouses or sisters become the primary earners. And instead of feeling emasculated, many found relief. Some discovered the joy of being home with children, cooking, or slowing down. This was the first crack in the ego for many—a necessary one.

Psychologists have long argued that the repression of emotion leads to anxiety, aggression, and even violence. Indian men are among the least likely to seek mental health support, and that's not because they don’t suffer—but because the ego has told them they must not show weakness.
Now, there’s a small but growing trend of Indian men opening up. From anonymous Reddit forums to men’s support circles in urban cities like Mumbai, Bengaluru, and Delhi—men are slowly beginning to talk. About heartbreak. About loneliness. About their fears of not being “man enough.”
It's in these honest, raw moments that we see the real power of vulnerability.

Male friendships in India, too, are undergoing a quiet transformation. For a long time, bonding meant drinking, banter, and bravado. Emotions were either mocked or brushed aside.
Today, conversations between male friends are changing. Men are checking in on each other. They’re discussing burnout, therapy, relationship struggles. They're admitting that they feel pressure, that they're tired, and that they don't always have it together.
And the beautiful part? They're not being judged for it.

Gone are the days when a father's primary role was to earn and enforce discipline. A new generation of Indian fathers is stepping up—not just as providers but as nurturers. They're changing diapers, attending school functions, and even taking paternity leave.
This reshaping of fatherhood is a direct challenge to the male ego that once frowned upon "women's work." And in doing so, it's giving their children—especially sons—a new model of manhood to look up to.

Let’s be clear: the evolution of masculinity in India isn't universal. In many rural pockets and traditional families, the old male ego still thrives. Change here is slower, met with resistance, and often dismissed as “Western influence” or “nonsense.”
And that’s okay. Cultural shifts take time. But the conversation has started. The whispers have become loud enough to echo.

Letting go of the ego doesn’t mean giving up masculinity. It means rebuilding it—on healthier, more inclusive terms. When men no longer feel the need to perform or suppress, they become better partners, better fathers, and most importantly, better versions of themselves.
It's not about emasculating men. It’s about liberating them—from the burden of perfection, from the fear of softness, and from the toxic belief that emotions are a weakness.
When men evolve, everyone benefits. Homes become kinder. Workplaces become more empathetic. Relationships become deeper. Society becomes more balanced.

Yes, the Indian male ego is under threat. But that threat isn’t destruction. It’s transformation. The discomfort some men feel today is the growing pain of a culture unlearning centuries of conditioning. And if we continue down this path—with empathy, openness, and courage—what awaits us is not the death of masculinity, but its rebirth.
Not weaker. Just wiser.

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