Why Indian Women Ignore Men Like Inder at First but Fall for Them Later – A Sanam Teri Kasam Reflection

In Sanam Teri Kasam, Inder is not your typical Bollywood hero. He doesn’t possess the usual traits of charm or confidence that women often find attractive at first sight. Instead, Inder is portrayed as a sensitive, somewhat brooding character who is misunderstood by the people around him. Saru, too, doesn’t initially see beyond his exterior—she dismisses him as someone who isn't fit to be a part of her life. His flaws, rather than his virtues, become his first impression.
In real life, too, Indian women sometimes overlook men like Inder for similar reasons. Society, with its fixation on external appearance and superficial qualities, tends to favor men who are outgoing, confident, and charismatic. This means that men who might be more introverted, emotionally available, or vulnerable often go unnoticed until deeper qualities emerge.
Indian culture, though evolving, often continues to place significant importance on superficial attributes, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. In many cases, men are expected to be outgoing, assertive, and successful from the get-go. Women may overlook men who don’t immediately fit this mold, even if they possess qualities such as empathy, loyalty, and emotional intelligence—traits that are often valued only in hindsight.
This phenomenon is explored in Sanam Teri Kasam. Saru’s first impression of Inder is shaped by his outward appearance and his reputation as a 'failure' or 'outsider'. She doesn’t initially notice his emotional depth, his caring nature, or the quiet strength he possesses. Instead, her judgments are clouded by her own pain, prejudice, and expectations of what love should look like.
In both the film and real life, the man who is initially overlooked slowly reveals his worth through his actions. Inder’s vulnerability, emotional depth, and his willingness to stand by Saru when she is at her lowest are qualities that eventually win her over. For women in India, this gradual reveal can lead to a deeper, more meaningful connection that transcends superficiality.
Women may dismiss men like Inder at first, simply because they don’t fit the mold of what society tells them to seek. However, once they see beyond the surface and witness the man's integrity, emotional availability, and resilience, their perception changes. The slow burn of attraction, based on respect and admiration for a person’s character rather than outward traits, is often what makes these relationships stronger and more lasting.

In Sanam Teri Kasam, Saru undergoes a personal transformation that leads her to reevaluate her relationship with Inder. Initially, she is deeply hurt and emotionally scarred, leading her to push away anyone who seems too different or too distant from her idea of a perfect partner. Over time, as she begins to heal and confront her own emotional wounds, she realizes that Inder’s quiet support and love are the very things that help her recover.
This emotional growth is a significant aspect of why women like Saru (and perhaps many women in India) might fall for men like Inder later. It's not just about the man’s qualities—it's about how those qualities align with a woman’s emotional evolution and growth. In a society that often places unrealistic expectations on women, personal healing and emotional readiness are key factors in recognizing a partner’s true value.
The initial phase of a relationship often centers around first impressions, which are heavily influenced by societal standards, peer expectations, and personal insecurities. In many cases, it takes time for a woman to assess the true potential of a partner. What may seem like an unappealing or unlikely match at first can gradually transform into something deeper and more fulfilling once a woman has had the chance to appreciate the man's deeper qualities.
In the case of Sanam Teri Kasam, Saru’s relationship with Inder evolves in such a way that she eventually falls in love with him for who he truly is, beyond the surface. She realizes that his love for her is not just a fleeting attraction, but a steady, unconditional force that anchors her through her darkest moments.

The reasons women fall in love with men like Inder later are multifaceted:


Ultimately, Sanam Teri Kasam offers a beautiful reflection of how relationships grow and evolve. The love between Saru and Inder is a testament to the power of emotional connection, vulnerability, and the gradual discovery of one another’s true worth. For Indian women, the story mirrors the emotional journey many experience: a journey where initial judgments give way to a deeper, more lasting bond, built on trust, understanding, and shared vulnerability.
In real life, the story of men like Inder being initially overlooked but eventually embraced for their authenticity is something that resonates with many. It highlights the importance of looking beyond the surface and embracing the quiet, often overlooked strength that can lead to lasting love.