How to Share Your Demisexuality with a Partner or Friend

Opening up about being demisexual—meaning you only feel sexual attraction after forming a deep emotional connection—can feel a bit tricky, but it’s worth it for building better understanding in your relationships. Here’s a simple, step-by-step guide on how to share this part of yourself, using examples from Indian films and shows to make it more relatable.
Before talking to someone, figure out why it’s important for you to share this. Are you trying to explain your feelings, or set boundaries for your relationship? Knowing why will help you have a clearer, easier conversation. It’s like Tamasha—Ranbir Kapoor’s character shares his true self to live authentically.

Pick a calm, relaxed time to have the conversation, like during a quiet evening or a peaceful walk—just like in Dil Dhadakne Do, when characters have deep, meaningful chats in private moments. This helps the discussion feel natural and comfortable.

Instead of using complex words, keep it simple:
"For some people, attraction is instant, but for me, I need to feel emotionally connected before I feel attracted."
It’s like in Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara—the emotional connection between the characters grows over time, leading to a deep bond and attraction.
Be straightforward:
"I’m demisexual, which means I don’t feel attracted to someone until I’ve formed an emotional bond."
Like in Kahaani, Vidya Balan’s character is honest and direct about her mission, making her intentions clear. This approach avoids confusion.

Your partner or friend might have questions. Let them ask, but keep the tone respectful and understanding, just like in Gully Boy, where people discuss difficult topics with care.
Let them know how being demisexual impacts your relationship:
"Emotional closeness is key for me. I can’t feel romantic attraction without it, like the gradual relationship build-up in Barfi!."
This helps them understand that it’s not about rejecting them, but about how you experience attraction.
It’s like in Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani, where characters need time to understand their feelings. Your partner or friend might need time to process what you’ve said. Give them space to reflect.
If they’re curious, share articles or videos about demisexuality, just like in Dear Zindagi, where Alia Bhatt’s character learns more about herself and her relationships through therapy.
Like in Kapoor & Sons, characters need time to figure things out. Let your partner or friend take their time to process what you’ve shared.
Opening up is a brave thing to do, just like in Piku, where characters have honest conversations to grow closer. Even if the conversation is awkward, be proud of sharing your true self.

Talking about being demisexual helps create deeper connections in relationships. Like in movies such as Dil Chahta Hai and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara, understanding each other’s feelings builds strong bonds. By being clear, patient, and honest, you can create a supportive space for both you and your loved ones.