Why Does RELIGION Force WOMEN to Stay in Toxic Marriages?

"Shaadi ka laddoo jo khaye woh pachtaye, jo na khaye woh bhi pachtaye."

But what if you’re forced to keep eating that laddoo even when it’s rotten — because "log kya kahenge?" Marriage in India isn’t just a relationship; it’s a religious contract sealed with the weight of centuries of patriarchy. For women, it's less of a sacred bond and more of a life sentence — with no parole. Divorce isn’t just discouraged; it’s treated as a moral and spiritual failure. And the punishment for walking away? Lifetime membership to the "bad wife club" — complete with labels like "ghar todne wali," "selfish aurat," and "not a good bahu."

Religion, the very force meant to bring peace and moral clarity, often becomes the chain that binds women to toxic marriages. Hinduism, Islam, and Christianity — each with its own holy books and moral codes — have one thing in common: women are expected to endure. Obedience, submission, and sacrifice — these are not just marital expectations; they are religious commandments. But why does faith, which preaches love and compassion, become a weapon of control when it comes to women in marriage? Let’s pull back the curtain on how religious teachings, outdated laws, and social expectations trap women in toxic marriages — and why leaving is often harder than surviving.


In Hinduism, marriage is not seen as a contract but as a samskara — a sacred, eternal bond lasting saat janam (seven lifetimes). Divorce, while legally permitted under the Hindu Marriage Act of 1955, remains culturally unacceptable. A woman seeking divorce is automatically seen as the problem — "she didn’t try hard enough," "she couldn’t adjust," "she couldn’t keep the family together."

A divorced Hindu woman is not only seen as a personal failure but also as a spiritual one. Society is quick to remind her that "marriage is about compromise" — which is code for "stay quiet and suffer." After all, "suhagan hi swarg jaati hai," right?

Islam technically allows women to seek divorce (khula), but the process is anything but equal. Until recently, the practice of Triple Talaq allowed Muslim men to divorce their wives instantly by saying "talaq" three times — over the phone, through a text, or even on WhatsApp. While the Muslim Women (Protection of Rights on Marriage) Act, 2019 criminalized Triple Talaq, the power imbalance remains stark.

And if a Muslim woman speaks up against this imbalance? She’s accused of being "too Western," "too modern," or worst of all — "against Islam." Because in the eyes of religious leaders, obedience is faith — even if it means suffering in silence.

In Christianity, marriage is treated as a divine covenant. Divorce is not just discouraged — it’s treated as a sin. In Catholicism, divorce isn’t even an option unless the marriage is annulled — and that process is notoriously difficult.

A Christian woman leaving her husband isn’t just abandoning a relationship — she’s challenging the moral framework of her entire community. The underlying message? Suffering in silence is a virtue; self-respect is a sin.
Religious teachings alone aren’t enough to trap women — society steps in to reinforce the punishment. A divorced woman is a walking scarlet letter — marked by endless social humiliation and judgment.

Good luck finding a second marriage proposal. Even progressive families hesitate to accept a divorced woman as a daughter-in-law. And if she dares to remain single? Even worse. A divorced man is seen as "eligible" — a divorced woman is seen as "defective."

Religious institutions have a vested interest in preserving patriarchal marriage structures because they reinforce male dominance and control.

Religious leaders rarely challenge these interpretations because they benefit from the existing power imbalance. A submissive wife ensures the continuation of male dominance — within both the home and the religious institution.

Religious teachings push the narrative that suffering is a virtue. A woman who endures an abusive marriage is seen as morally superior to one who walks away. Cultural conditioning reinforces that a "good wife" sacrifices, adjusts, and tolerates. Women who challenge this are branded as rebellious or immoral. The fear of being labeled as a "failed wife" or "bad mother" often outweighs the pain of staying in an unhappy marriage.

Marriage isn’t dharma — it’s a relationship, not a life sentence. A toxic one doesn’t need prayer; it needs an exit plan. Religious institutions must stop romanticizing suffering as sacrifice and start honoring personal agency. Women need more than just emotional strength to walk away — they need financial security and legal backing to leave without being condemned. Family honor shouldn’t be built on a woman’s endurance of pain — it should rest on her right to choose peace over misery.

Leaving a toxic marriage isn’t a moral failure — it’s an act of survival. It’s not the woman who walks away that’s broken — it’s the system that taught her endurance is virtue and freedom is sin.