5 Gita Shlokas to Stop Over-Giving and Start Receiving
Riya Kumari | Dec 12, 2025, 14:17 IST
Krishna
( Image credit : Freepik )
You give until your chest aches. You forgive before the apology comes. You stay soft in rooms that keep proving they don’t deserve your softness. And somewhere in the middle of all this over-care, you lose track of the one person who needed your gentleness the most - you. Most people don’t understand this exhaustion. They see your kindness. They don’t see how much you bleed for it.
When You Are the One Who Always Pours, But No One Fills You Back. There is a pattern you don’t talk about. You give, because you’re afraid of being replaceable. You overextend, because silence feels like rejection. You love loudly, because you fear people who love quietly. You carry their crises, because no one ever carried yours. And somewhere, without realizing it, you became the person who gives even when you are empty… and receives almost nothing in return. But the Bhagavad Gita doesn’t celebrate self-sacrifice that destroys you. It teaches a fierce form of self-respect, a dharma that protects your energy, dignity, and emotional boundaries.
You give too much because you’re terrified of loss
“Just as rivers enter the vast ocean which stays unmoved, so do all desires enter a steady mind. That person finds peace, not one who chases desires endlessly.”
You over-give because you hope it will secure the relationship. You think:
“If I give more, they’ll stay.”
“If I show I’m indispensable, they won’t leave.”
“If I adjust, accommodate, bend… they will finally choose me.”
But this is a desire for emotional security trying to fill a wound - a wound that never had anything to do with them. Krishna says: Peace comes only when you stop pouring your self-worth into someone else’s approval. Ask yourself: “Am I giving because it’s love? Or because I’m afraid they’ll leave if I stop?” If it’s fear, pause. That pause is the beginning of self-respect.
You think your pain is noble, it’s not
“It is better to live your own dharma imperfectly, than to live another’s dharma perfectly.”
Over-giving happens when you abandon your own needs, boundaries, and emotional truth to please someone else. You think you’re being kind. But spiritually, you’re deserting your dharma, your duty to protect yourself.
You shape-shift to be liked.
You silence your hurt to maintain peace.
You play the “strong one” because you fear being a burden.
This is not virtue. This is self-abandonment disguised as love. Your dharma is not to serve endlessly. Your dharma is to honour your limits. Ask yourself: “What is MY truth in this moment?” Let that truth - not fear, not guilt, guide your giving.
You confuse attachment with compassion
“One who is kind and compassionate to all and yet free from unhealthy attachment, that person is truly dear to Me.”
You believe caring means carrying. But Krishna is clear: Compassion is pure only when it does not come from attachment, fear, or insecurity. Many people over-give because:
they fear losing connection
they want to be irreplaceable
they think love must be earned
they hope giving will make the other person finally reciprocate
But this is not compassion. This is emotional bargaining. Before you give, ask: “Am I giving out of love, or out of fear of losing them?” If it’s the second, your heart is negotiating, not loving. Give without dissolving yourself. Love without erasing your boundaries.
Your attachment to their reaction steals your peace
“You have the right to your actions, but never to the reactions or results.”
You over-give because you are addicted to the outcome. You hope:
“They’ll appreciate me.”
“They’ll change.”
“They’ll finally see my worth.”
“They’ll treat me better if I give more.”
But Krishna says: The moment you become attached to the result, you lose your clarity, peace, and strength. You can choose your effort. You can never control the outcome. Detach from the fantasy that your giving will transform them. Some people take more because you allow it. Some people give less because you compensate. Detach. Step back. Let the reality reveal itself.
You think you’re being selfless, but you’re running from yourself
“Lift yourself by yourself. Never allow yourself to fall into your own neglect.”
Over-giving is often a distraction from your own loneliness, hurt, or emptiness.
It’s easier to fix others, than admit where you feel broken.
It’s easier to rescue, than admit you need rescuing.
It’s easier to give, than admit you are afraid to receive.
Krishna’s words are blunt: You must protect yourself from yourself - from your patterns, your wounds, your fear-driven choices. Receiving feels uncomfortable because it exposes your vulnerability. Start small:
You Don’t Need to Give More. You Need to Give Differently
The Gita doesn’t ask you to stop loving. It asks you to stop bleeding in the name of love. If your giving costs: your peace, your dignity, your emotional balance, your sleep, your self-respect, then it is no longer compassion. It is self-destruction. Healthy giving comes from fullness. Over-giving comes from fear. Your soul knows the difference. Let this be the moment you finally say: “I deserve to receive too.” And you do. You always did. You were just too busy proving your worth to see it.
You give too much because you’re terrified of loss
“Just as rivers enter the vast ocean which stays unmoved, so do all desires enter a steady mind. That person finds peace, not one who chases desires endlessly.”
“If I give more, they’ll stay.”
“If I adjust, accommodate, bend… they will finally choose me.”
But this is a desire for emotional security trying to fill a wound - a wound that never had anything to do with them. Krishna says: Peace comes only when you stop pouring your self-worth into someone else’s approval. Ask yourself: “Am I giving because it’s love? Or because I’m afraid they’ll leave if I stop?” If it’s fear, pause. That pause is the beginning of self-respect.
You think your pain is noble, it’s not
“It is better to live your own dharma imperfectly, than to live another’s dharma perfectly.”
Over-giving happens when you abandon your own needs, boundaries, and emotional truth to please someone else. You think you’re being kind. But spiritually, you’re deserting your dharma, your duty to protect yourself.
You shape-shift to be liked.
You silence your hurt to maintain peace.
You play the “strong one” because you fear being a burden.
This is not virtue. This is self-abandonment disguised as love. Your dharma is not to serve endlessly. Your dharma is to honour your limits. Ask yourself: “What is MY truth in this moment?” Let that truth - not fear, not guilt, guide your giving.
You confuse attachment with compassion
“One who is kind and compassionate to all and yet free from unhealthy attachment, that person is truly dear to Me.”
You believe caring means carrying. But Krishna is clear: Compassion is pure only when it does not come from attachment, fear, or insecurity. Many people over-give because:
they fear losing connection
they want to be irreplaceable
they think love must be earned
they hope giving will make the other person finally reciprocate
But this is not compassion. This is emotional bargaining. Before you give, ask: “Am I giving out of love, or out of fear of losing them?” If it’s the second, your heart is negotiating, not loving. Give without dissolving yourself. Love without erasing your boundaries.
Your attachment to their reaction steals your peace
“You have the right to your actions, but never to the reactions or results.”
You over-give because you are addicted to the outcome. You hope:
“They’ll appreciate me.”
“They’ll change.”
“They’ll finally see my worth.”
“They’ll treat me better if I give more.”
But Krishna says: The moment you become attached to the result, you lose your clarity, peace, and strength. You can choose your effort. You can never control the outcome. Detach from the fantasy that your giving will transform them. Some people take more because you allow it. Some people give less because you compensate. Detach. Step back. Let the reality reveal itself.
You think you’re being selfless, but you’re running from yourself
“Lift yourself by yourself. Never allow yourself to fall into your own neglect.”
Over-giving is often a distraction from your own loneliness, hurt, or emptiness.
It’s easier to fix others, than admit where you feel broken.
It’s easier to rescue, than admit you need rescuing.
It’s easier to give, than admit you are afraid to receive.
Krishna’s words are blunt: You must protect yourself from yourself - from your patterns, your wounds, your fear-driven choices. Receiving feels uncomfortable because it exposes your vulnerability. Start small:
- Accept help.
- Accept appreciation.
- Accept rest.
- Accept love without trying to “repay” it.
You Don’t Need to Give More. You Need to Give Differently
The Gita doesn’t ask you to stop loving. It asks you to stop bleeding in the name of love. If your giving costs: your peace, your dignity, your emotional balance, your sleep, your self-respect, then it is no longer compassion. It is self-destruction. Healthy giving comes from fullness. Over-giving comes from fear. Your soul knows the difference. Let this be the moment you finally say: “I deserve to receive too.” And you do. You always did. You were just too busy proving your worth to see it.